Jan. 15, 2021

051 - What’s on Your Shelf?

051 - What’s on Your Shelf?

Welcome to The Fully Lived Life podcast! A podcast for those who are longing to pursue the full life and want to break free from anything that holds them back. Listen in as two friends - a psychologist, Dr. Merry and a life coach, Gillian - talk about life, love and purpose - with wisdom, humour and transparency -  through the lens of science, psychology, and life experiences.

What:

Are you anticipating new things and experiences in 2021?  Are you taking stock of 2020? The phrase “on the shelf” pertains to dreams, longings, hopes, wants on the shelf and perhaps even putting life on hold. Are you white-knuckling through life?  Let’s dive in.

2020 was a year that necessitated some things go on the shelf for a season - travel, entertaining, hugging, etc. But have you ever talked yourself out of some dream or longing because of excuses that you have placed on your dreams as if they have an expiration date?

So What:

Dig deep into what you have shelved, for example, travel, and see the deep underlying value that goes along with it, ie, adventure. What emotions go along with the value? Can you get creative about how you go about fueling those values and fostering the emotions that go along with them?

We continue to return to the concept of internal locus of control vs the external locus of control and how we have much more choice than we often give ourselves credit for.

Now What:

Gillian and Merry both share things that they have placed on the shelf. What about you? “One day or day one”:  will you get to it one day or will today be your day one of the thing you really want to do?

Life Coaching Tip:

Draw a bookshelf. Label all the things you have placed on the shelf big and small.

Create the visual. Then move to the therapeutic tip!

Therapeutic tip:

The visual of the bookshelf may bring some shame or regret. If it does, it’s ok because it is not new pain, it’s existing pain you are just bringing to the light of day. What are the narratives, beliefs that are holding you back? Don’t be afraid to get help to move forward with a program, a therapist, a coach etc. Get the external help to help make the internal constructs.

Links:

Dr. Merry’s book: https://amzn.to/2rCrJyI

Dr. Merry’s videos: https://bit.ly/377eFR0

Dr. Merry’s website: https://drmerry.com

Dr. Lin & Associates: http://drlinandassociates.com

Gillian’s Website: https://gillianmcshane.com