Welcome to The Fully Lived Life podcast! A podcast for those who are longing to pursue the full life and want to break free from anything that holds them back. Listen in as two friends - a psychologist, Dr. Merry, and a life coach, Gillian - talk about life, love, and purpose - with wisdom, humour, and transparency - through the lens of science, psychology, and faith.
Today’s episode concludes our conversation into the Inner Critic. The inner critic can show up in a variety of different ways. Learning to recognize it takes practice. The inner critic is a structure within our ego-personality that judges. It judges us. It judges others. It tends to shame us, blame us, and make us feel bad about ourselves.
The Enneagram can open the door and show us how our inner critic works based on type-specific dynamics..
When we let our inner critics rule, we settle for a shadow version of our lives:
Type 1—Ones want goodness but settle for order.
Type 2—Twos want unconditional love but settler for niceness.
Type 3—Threes want worth but settle for image.
Type 4—Fours want belonging but settle for longing.
Type 5—Fives want competency but settle for knowledge.
Type 6—Sixes want loyalty but settle for safety.
Type 7—Sevens want contentment but settle for excitement.
Type 8—Eights want protection but settle for control.
Type 9—Nines want peace but settle for calm.
Work toward developing a capacity for awareness in the moment and presence, catching or noticing an inner critic attack in real-time and dropping in. But even if we don’t notice it in the moment, we can reflect each day, through journaling, where our inner critic showed up during the day. But getting to know our own unique inner critic is really important. So, identifying what the targets are, identifying what some of the specific messages are around those targets in an objective way without allowing the inner critic to judge us for having an inner critic.
Life Coaching Response:
Can you find yourself represented in any of the Enneagram numbers we discussed?What do you want that your inner critic is protecting you from?
Can you address the needs your inner critic is meeting and have compassion on the way the critic shows up but then work towards the healthy side of your Enneagram number?
Dr. Merry’s book: https://amzn.to/2rCrJyI
Dr. Merry’s videos: https://bit.ly/377eFR0
Dr. Merry’s website: https://drmerry.com
Dr. Lin & Associates: http://drlinandassociates.com
Gillian’s Website: https://gillianmcshane.com